i'm not back, but i'm on my way, baby (2025)

i'm not back, but i'm on my way, baby (1)

whoaaa, we're half way there…

Whoa-oh, livin' on a prayer (unless you’re the Dolly and then it’s Whoa-oh, livin' on a prairie!) And if you’re like me and you need to listen to the song now you can click here. I don’t know what type of healing powers exist in this song, but each time it plays, it’s like there’s some sort of missing transponder in the depths of my soul that starts to glow. I must be cured. Kidding.

This week, buckets of snow dumped around The Greater Seattle Area. Normally the snow makes me so happy. I love how magical it feels and how quiet it makes everything. But this week, it annoyed me. Likely due to my bah humbug attitude, I couldn’t get past the grievances that come with snow: Freezing cold temperatures (and the risk of another frozen pipe), slippery roads that trap you at home, and a filthy car when you finally do venture out. But, today the sun is out, and shining directly into my eyes as I type. I’ll trade the risk of temporary blindness for the warmth of a long-lost celestial friend.

It almost feels risky to say out loud, for fear of jinxing it, but I do feel like I’m starting the upswing, from where I was last week. Maybe this is a vitamin D deficiency after all?

I share a little about the people that helped dig me out a bit this week in the next section, but I’m starting to feel like the old mule from a parable you may have heard. I remember our FFA president sharing the story at one of the annual award dinners. Not only am I paraphrasing from a story I heard almost 20 years ago, I’m applying it to where I sit today, so bear with me…

The old mule (me), fell into an abandoned well (depression). Feeling overwhelmed and full of fear, he screamed and hollered to get the attention of the farmer (you). Upon seeing his old friend in the well, the farmer makes a decision and starts shoveling dirt on top of the mule. At first, the mule doesn’t understand why the farmer would do this. (Was this the end?) But he shakes off the dirt, which now piles around his feet (hooves?) and steps up. It clicks! The dirt continues to fall, the mule continues to shake it off and step up until he’s able to climb up and out of out of the well. Reunited and free, at last!

When you’re already feeling down, little annoyances you could normally shake off, almost feel like they’re pebbles or rocks that fill up your pockets and weigh you down. This week, I’ve tried to recall this story, channel my inner old mule and shake off what I can. I’m not out of the well yet, but I’m inching closer to the surface and I couldn’t be more hopeful. This is good. 🤍

Hi, I’m David — your millennial GBF with a mental health and lifestyle blog, weekly newsletter, and long-forgotten (but maybe soon-to-return?) podcast. Let's be friends!

little rays of light

You say disassociation, I say healthy distraction. Here are some of the glimmers that made me smile and got me through the week. Follow @AvecDavid on Instagram for even more fun mid-week!

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thankful for good people

Not to sound like a YouTube beauty influencer turned mental health advocate, but I have to send a very sincere thank you to everyone that reached out this week. I know our little community here is small, but it’s still a little nerve wracking to open up about important topics for you/anyone (including your coworkers) to read about. I was greeted this week by thoughtful messages, thank you’s for sharing about my depression in this forum, quality time with friends that (thankfully) got me out of the house, and two beautiful bouquets of flowers and tasty treats — the true way to my heart. Forever grateful for your support in my online journaling journey — whatever it may be that week. 😉

checking-in to the white lotus thailand

T-minus seven days until the premiere season three of The White Lotus. I’ve only seen the teaser from above, but if it’s half as good as season two, then we’re all in for a wild ride. RIP Tanya. What am I the most excited for (besides the White Lotus Abercrombie shirt I found)? The intro song that will undoubtedly be the song of the season. This may actually possess the potential to rip me from the clutches of my lingering my winter blues.

seeking mr. rogers with an edge

It’s almost been a year (I think) since I was seeing a therapist regularly. The last one had some redeeming qualities, but couldn’t take a joke. And I’m sorry, but to unpack the crates I have lying around, I need someone that can lean into the dark humor — not be scared by it. I’m not saying I’m Wednesday Addams or anything, but I’m often compelled to laugh at inappropriate times and my inner child or inner teenager is too angsty to be that serious. In my next therapist, I need a Mr. Rogers with an edge. Someone that’s seen some stuff — or better yet, that’s lived through it. So, I’m on the hunt! I have a few intro calls over the next few weeks that I’m really excited about. I’ll keep you posted with how these progress. Fingers crossed!


three cheers for billy

Billy has earned a Sunday morning shout out for taking the car load of clothes, office supplies, and assorted homewares to the donation drop off this morning. We’re one step closer to me being able to get Nikola back in the garage and not looking like a couple on Hoarders each time we open the roll-up door. Consider this the “many brownie points” you requested, B. It’s virtual, and mysterious… just like Bitcoin! 🤑

fake book club

i'm not back, but i'm on my way, baby (11)

Oops! I’m a book (and a half?) behind in my goal, but don’t you sweat it, friend. I’m currently hurtling through The Wedding People* which has thoroughly surprised me. I don’t want to be the source of any spoilers, but this took a turn early on that I wasn’t expecting. I was warned, that one should be in a good headspace when reading this book — but I think this little dark dramedy is helping heal my seasonally depressed brain. See notes on dark humor above. 😅 I’ll be sure to post my final thoughts and rating on Goodreads when I wrap up this week. I’m thinking of starting The Perfect Marriage* next, have you read it?

Follow Me on Goodreads

go sports!

Are you doing something fun for the Super Bowl? Also, I JUST learned that it’s Super Bowl and not Superbowl. Thanks Grammarly. Just kidding, she and I don’t get along.

i'm not back, but i'm on my way, baby (12)

It should come as no surprise that I’m not a football guy. Never was, and never will be. Though, I sometimes tune in to the halftime show or the occasional commercial. Something about the insanely high cost of a Superbowl commercial intrigues me.

In some sort of trauma response I’m sure, I will turn on a game (low volume) to lull me into a midday nap — much like it did when I was young. But, if you’re nearby and you have a setup like this (or really good snacks), send me a drop pin, and maybe I’ll stop by. I need something to happen to push Taylor into releasing Reputation (Taylor’s Version), so go Taylor’s boyfriend! 🏈

Anyway, I’m off to the Gay Super Bowl — aka brunch! Toodles!XO,
D

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i'm not back, but i'm on my way, baby (2025)

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